I am a mom of two beautiful girls–the loves of my life. I am also over five years in recovery from eating disorders. This is my journey from starving to letting myself become FULL –physically & emotionally. I hope we can remain in recovery (A.K.A FULL) together-join me ♥
What is Living A FULL life exactly? Having anorexia, bulimia, or vacillating between the two, you are emptying yourself or trying to achieve an empty feeling through starvation or purging. Living A FULL life is a life where you aren’t starving anymore—starving for acceptance and love from others and yourself. It’s a life where you are feeding your mind and soul with good thoughts and foods. It’s a life without your eating disorder. With our eating disorders, we are empty of opportunity, growth, challenge, and possibility. Living A FULL life means filling up our lives again with immense potential, happiness, and achievement.
It’s a life where you make mistakes, and you are not hard on yourself for those mistakes. A life where you are self-aware enough to go against your negative thoughts and outside your comfort zone and are able to make healthy decisions. It’s a life where you are able to nourish your body and soul with nutritious and delicious foods, and fuck it, if you want dessert, you are going to have it and not think twice. A life where you can beat your eating disorder at its own game of shame, guilt, and manipulation and realize that life isn’t a losing battle. Your battle is just a small part of you; it doesn’t define you. Once you beat it and own it so you are held accountable to yourself and others about that struggle, you will become immensely stronger and well on your way to being FULL.
Oh and a big part of my own personal FULL is mom life—which is featured in my Musings Of A FULL Mama section. It’s just some anecdotes, lists, and non-ED related thoughts about my life as a mom. At the other end of the spectrum, we have Musings of An ED Recovered Lady, which is purely a reflection of my time with eating disorders. The bulk of my blogging is in the Musings Of ED In Relation To Being A Mom section, because let’s face it both recovery and motherhood are integral parts of who I am–so I am going to be writing about them together a lot! I also like to incorporate humor into most of my writing because I believe it’s good to laugh in life, especially when talking about a dark topic like mental illness.
I have been published on Bluntmoms, Beating Eating Disorders, Project Heal, Kveller.com, The Mighty, ellenNation, Love What Matters, CafeMom.com, Sammiches and Psych Meds, Motherly, Scary Mommy, Her View From Home, Recovery Warriors, and Humorwriters.org. Hope I can help lead you to your own FULL.
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